Q+A with the Grinch: thieving, Martha May, and heart pains

Dec 22, 2016

After spotting the Grinch at the Padanaram Christmas Festival earlier this month, we knew we had to score an interview.

We dug up court documents dating to this time last year, when the Dartmouth Police arrested the Grinch for attempting to steal Christmas, but it wasn't until Susan Grace at EncorENTERTAINMENT called us up to say the Grinch was visiting her customers that we were finally able to get a question-and-answer from the green, furry Scrooge.

After pestering the Grinch to take our phone call, we got him to talk Martha May, thievery, and heart pains.

After robbing citizens on Christmas Eve, what do you think your collection was worth?

The stuff seems pretty cheap to me, but I would say at least $19.95. It took me as long as it takes Fat Boy, I mean Santa Claus, to run my errands.

You does your four-legged companion, Max, think of your hobby?

He doesn't really like it all that much, but he doesn't really have any say because I feed him.

How did it feel when your heart grew three sizes?

It was two sizes too small, which I was pretty proud of because I had worked on that. But then it grew three sizes. It was like a Mack truck going through one ear and out the other.

Going through school was pretty rough on you as a child. Do you sympathize with Dartmouth students at all?

I sympathize with the kids because they have to grow up into adults. It's a track, and they shouldn't grow up. They should stay kids.

What are your plans for Christmas Eve this year?

Now that I'm done with the Who's [in Whoville], Martha May and I are just going to have some hot cocoa and maybe watch "It's a Wonderful Life."

What did you think of the way Universal Studios portrayed your story in the 2000 film?

I think Jim Carrey did a good job, but I think I look more like Johnny Depp.

What do you think Santa will bring you for Christmas?

Santa's kind of a tricky dude. If he wants to get me a gift, that's cool. I'm hoping to get a new car made out of solid gold. If not, I'm used to it.

What's the nicest thing you've ever done?

Giving back Christmas. I could've just dropped it all off the mountain.